I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
