She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
