I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
