i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
