You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
