This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
