Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
