im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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