Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
