I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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