he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
