At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
