wat bout pragnant strippers??
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize