Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
