I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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