Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Randomize
