He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
