Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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