not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
