just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
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