Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
