So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
