Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
