It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
