love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
