When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
