Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
