woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize