How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Randomize