You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
