Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
