I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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