Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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