Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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