It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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