It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
she pinky promised me she was 18
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
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