You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
