I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
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