Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
