What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
