When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
should my penis look like a turkey
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
