Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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