So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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