we have officially lost it.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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