Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
i think my cat just said my name.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
