I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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