its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
