You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
