i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
