The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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