so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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