so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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